To do that, I will channel the hysterical leftist wimps, much the same way Pencil Neck (Schiff) tried to do that in order to put words into Trump's famous phone call transcript. The big difference will be he was lying through his teeth and I'll be telling the truth, not to mention mine will be funny, something that ass clown is incapable of achieving. So, here goes.
Pres. Trump, how dare you offend all of us! We're the experts, the establishment, the powers that be, the DC insiders who know best. We're unelected and generally unaccountable, so we don't GAS what the voters think, especially those who were dumb enough to vote for you. When we want their opinion, we'll give it to them in the form of speeches, liberal news and fake polls that were never meant to accurately record public opinion, only to make it go our way. We may be targeting you, but it's really those idiots who elected you we wanna take down and put in their place. We wanna make sure they NEVER do something like that again and won't forgive their snub of The Hag until they make amends by electing one of our dolts, like Plugs, or one of several communist hacks in 2020. You're just in the way, Donny, that's all!
We've been working 24/7 for decades to destroy this nation and punish it for the audacity to think America is exceptional in any way. Obama got off to a great start when he traveled the world apologizing for the nation he was probably not born in. He then delivered on his vow to fundamentally transform this nation into the model of mediocrity he cleverly named the "new normal". Look at what King Barry accomplished in 8 years, how dare you clean that up and make our messiah look bad!
For decades our State Dept., diplomatic corps,and endless list of useless bureaucrats who serve beyond any POTUS have worked tirelessly to demean the USA, cut it down to size and allow the rest of the hateful envious world to fleece us sans Vaseline. It's been our mission to let the world know we're to blame for all that ails them, be it their corruption, spinelessness that allows jihadist infestation that is destroying their heritage and identity, confiscatory taxation and over regulation that kills jobs, any creative initiative and a basic inability to protect their own native populations.
We've made sure America supports these corrupt, dysfunctional states and uses destructive cabals like the UN to gang up on us and give Americans the finger by putting countries like Red China and Cuba on the UN's Human Rights Council. Of course we also let them skip the bill when it comes to paying their fair share of NATO and UN dues. And why not, it's our fault these people are bankrupt. Then you come out and expose all this corruption and accommodation by our useless enablers. The Middle East has been a total debacle for decades and we fully intended to keep it this way, regardless of how much blood and treasure the USA spends to make sure the dysfunction stays as it is. How dare you remove 50 soldiers that we had as sitting ducks, all to make sure Mrs. Mohammed can vote for Sharia Law. We were the the ones who convinced that idiot, George W. Bush, to get into an endless war that cost him the House, Senate and leaving office with a failed, 30% approval. He played along and never said a word about it because he was dumb enough to fall for that "prestige of the office" BS we've been rolling you Republicans with forever. Then you come along and actually put the needs of our soldiers, taxpayers and nation above the Middle East, how dare you?! Let's talk about Russia and Ukraine, OMG have you messed that up!
When Vlad the Runt invaded Crimea, King Barry showed him what he meant by "more flexibility" when he bent over and said nothing. In response to the Ukrainians' pleas for defensive weapons, Barry sent them blankies, MREs and binoculars. At least this way they weren't hot, cold, or hungry and could see the Russkies invading from a farther distance. How dare you sell them Javelin missiles, fool, don't you know the Left worships on the altar of defenselessness, whether it's disarming lawful gun owners at home or leaving nations unable to repel invaders abroad?! Quid Pro Joe Biden took his idiot son, Sloppy Seconds Crackhead Hunter to Kiev and he showed those Ukies who's boss, yes he did! He got them to give Sloppy a cushy $83K per month, no show job in a field he had zero knowledge or experience in. And you thought YOU were the deal maker, ha! When Ukraine appointed an investigator to look into that dirty Burisma scam, Papa Joe had to come to the half wit's rescue. He extorted the Ukrainians to either fire the pesky investigator in 6 hours or lose $2 billion in U.S. aid. He even told them not to think he was bluffing and call Barry if they doubted his resolve. Quid Pro Joe even bragged about this to a room full of sycophants.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXA--dj2-CY
When this happened, nobody in the Dem party or media had any problems with it, how dare you suggest it be looked into! Not only did we not care about Biden's flagrant quid pro quo extortion, we're gonna punish you for doing it, even though you didn't! Don't you know it's one of Alinsky's key rules (from Rules for Radicals, which Alinsky dedicated to Lucifer) telling his disciples to "accuse your enemies of what you're doing"? Well, Donny, that's exactly what we're doing and if we can convince enough stupid Americans to buy it, you'll be gone and Plugs will be POTUS in 2020! Wanna know we why do as we please and feel entitled to do so? Most of us are dweebs, non entities whose entire reason for getting into politics is wealth & power. We always come out rich and set for life, no matter which party is in power or how rotten things are for the average American, it's our gravy train. You were already rich and actually had the gall to become POTUS, donate your salary and do something good for most Americans, that simply can't be tolerated.
We're the club, the clique, the chi chi soiree-you're just an ill mannered bull in our self righteous China shop, nothing more. So far, our circus has had dismal ratings, no one's watching or really cares much, but that won't stop us. Our media accomplices will go on 24/7 full spin mode and tell Americans what they're supposed to think. We have no evidence but will use emotion to sway the masses our Soviet style "education" machine has programmed the last 50 years. You see, Donny, we have no candidates that can beat you- not Plugs, not Fakehontas, not Booty Grab, not Comrade Bernie, not Bedbug Doomberg, nor any of the other irrelevant lightweights. Therefore we have no choice but to destroy you, either by impeachment or at least damaging you so enough idiots who believe our BS will turn on you. We've overseen decades of American mediocrity and debasement before the rest of the world and we're not about to let you come in and actually put the needs of the American people before those of the Deep State, unelected bureaucracy and anti-American politicians whose mission in life is to grow the size and power of govt. by keeping a permanent underclass of lifelong dependent voters who have no other option than to have govt. run their lives.
Okay, I'm out of character and back to being myself, I feel dirty, like I need a long hot shower! This, my friends, is what it's all about and we need to make the Left pay dearly in 2020. In closing, I wanna wish all of you and your families a Happy Thanksgiving!
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